In all spheres of life, we encounter people- in school, at home and anywhere else you can think of. This makes it so important that we understand others and know how to get along with them. After all, we are in this world together and if we’re ever going to pull this off, we have to help one another. Imagine the scenario where you woke up one day to find out that every human on the face of the earth had disappeared leaving you as the sole occupant of this planet (and it wasn’t rapture). If you are an extrovert, you’ll immediately feel the impact- you’ll have no one to listen to all your fascinating and exaggerated stories. On the other hand, if you’re an introvert, it would come as a relief- there’ll be no one to nag you all day. However, your joy may be cut short when you turn on the TV only to realize that there’s nothing to show because all those behind the machines are gone. With time, you’ll also notice that all the issues of food supply, electricity, pest, and animal control will fall squarely on your shoulders with no one to share the burden with. What a feeling that will be! It isn’t for nothing that our world today is so connected. Each day, new organizations, committees, and associations are birthed to foster cooperation among individuals to tackle issues of concern. The burden of living is so much that you’re impossible if you think you can do it all by yourself. Let’s take a second to eavesdrop on Jethro’s counsel to Moses, the great Jewish Leader when Moses was at a point where he thought he could lead the nation of Israel all by himself without any help.
Moses’ father-in-law replied, “What you are doing is not good. You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone.” Exodus 18:17-18 (NIV)
Besides the fact that people help to alleviate the burden of living, they also contribute to our overall health. From studies, we know that supportive relationships facilitate the recovery of people from sickness and bring a sense of happiness and fulfillment into living. One of such studies conducted by researchers from Harvard University showed that it was good relationships, not the amount of money accumulated or the accolades collected that keep us happier and healthier. Oftimes, we downplay the importance of relationships and choose to conveniently sacrifice them on the altar of accomplishment and fame but we forget that more than anything, the right relationships can deliver to us all these and so much more. The right relationships can satisfy the deepest longings of your heart and serve as a cushion against the adversities of life. Relationships are in several dimensions and each plays an important role in our lives. Whereas some are self-orchestrated, others are providential. Nonetheless, good relationships ultimately serve the purpose of revealing the Heart of Our Heavenly Father to us. Let’s consider some of the most common relationships.
The Family
The family is the most basic relationship we can have. We have no choice as to who gives birth to us- it just happens, and we find ourselves wherever we are today. Since it isn’t a matter of choice, we can attribute our birth into a certain family either to the providential work of Our Loving Heavenly Father or to a biological miscalculation. Dear friend, I want you to know that you aren’t an accident. Being in your family today is part of God’s design of glory for your life. Originally, parents are gifts from your Heavenly Father to reveal to you His fatherhood and love. All through the Bible, God is portrayed as a strong caring father and a tender-hearted mother. He reveals these qualities to you, His dear child, through your earthly parents to give you a sense of belonging and to satisfy your heart’s desire for unconditional love.
As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him; – Psalm 103: 13 (NIV)
Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me. – Isaiah 49:15-16 (NIV)
All too often many do not allow themselves to savour the blessings of belonging to a family. It is so easy and usually tempting especially as a youth to look beyond your family to seek emotional support and a sense of belonging from elsewhere. What if all that you have been searching for has been with you throughout all these years but you didn’t recognize it? Happiness according to C.H. Spurgeon (a well-known nineteenth-century preacher) is not measured by how much we have but by how much of it we enjoy. Even if all there is to your family is a remnant due to some circumstances- either you lost a parent or they’re divorced, you can trust God to use whatever is left of your family to bring about the satisfaction and joy of family living. If family living has turned sore for you due to abuses you suffer, trust the Lord to bypass all these abuses and hurts to reveal His fatherhood and unconditional love to you. God loves you- that’s all that matters!
Friends and colleagues
Friendship is the most dynamic of all relationships because, unlike family ties, this kind of relationship is subject to our choice. According to anthropologist Robin Dunbar, there’s a limit on how many meaningful relationships the human brain can keep track of. More specifically Dunbar hypothesized that the average person can have up to 5 intimate bonds, 15 close friends, 50 friends, and 150 casual friends. People however differ in their preferences. Some like to cast their net wide and build a massive empire of friends. Others, like myself, like to have just a handful of them. Whichever way you like it, a good friendship can be of tremendous help to you socially and emotionally. Although they might not share your surname, good friends share your ideals and give you that extra support just when you need it. They also insulate you from much boredom by keeping you company. Due to the nature of the schooling system, the facts show that we are forced to spend more time with our friends and colleagues than with our family. Whereas our friends may be spread across various backgrounds, our colleagues are more specific. Our colleagues are those that we are in the same class or workspace with. Our relationship with them facilitates our productivity.
Your Superiors
You’ll always have the luxury of learning from the wealth of experience of others. Some have dedicated several years of their lives to researching and learning about a particular endeavour. These include your lecturers, supervisors, senior partners, and pastors…everyone you report to. Ideally, all of these individuals have your progress at heart therefore you can resort to them from time to time to gain some clarity whenever your path looks blurry. The common mistake that most young people make is that they feel they have to be as brilliant or as ‘spiritual’ as their superiors to sustain a meaningful relationship with them. The good news is that they were once like you and knew little of what they know now when they were like you. They will gladly help you out with any difficulty if you approach them. The truth is that anytime you approach them with any difficulty, they feel complimented because you have deemed them as resource personnel, people of value from whom you can learn a lot.
Restpiration 